Monday, February 1, 2010

149: Steve Jobs, Our Lord and Savior & Nehemiah: In Review

Nehemiah 12-13
I rebuked them and called curses down on them. I beat some of the men and pulled out their hair. I made them take an oath in God's name and said: "You are not to give your daughters in marriage to their sons, nor are you to take their daughters in marriage for your sons or for yourselves." - Nehemiah 13:25

Chapter 12 is unexciting, more lists. Nehemiah lists all the priests and Levites. They also dedicate the wall of Jerusalem with much singing and rejoicing.

Overall, like Ezra, I'm not too upset with Nehemiah until the last chapter. His only crime so far is some over-zealous ego stroking, but we're all guilty of that. In chapter 13, however, he moves on to assault and battery. I'll get to that in a minute.

Chapter 13 starts with the Israelites reading the Book of Moses aloud for everyone to hear. In the book it says there should be no Ammonites or Moabites among the Israelites. When the Israelites hear this, they exclude anyone from Ammonite or Moabite descent. Really? Were these people doing anything wrong? Or are they just excluding them for maybe-crimes that their great, great, great, ..., great, great grandfathers committed? I suspect the latter.

Nehemiah returns to Jerusalem (after visiting with king Artaxerxes for "some time"). He finds that the Israelites are buying/selling things on the sabbath. So much for crying about not following the laws in the book of Moses. I agree that these rules are stupid (sabbath laws etc.), but it'd be nice if the Israelites didn't cry about not following them every few chapters only to go back to their "bad" ways a few chapters later.

Nehemiah then finds men that had married women from other countries. *gasp* And their children spoke the language of their native land. Bi-lingual children? *double gasp* Nehemiah goes with the only obvious solution, and beats the shit out of these foreigner marrying men (and pulls their hair out). I'm not quite sure what that accomplished.

The book ends with what's really important to Nehemiah; in his own words "Remember me with favor, O my God".

Nehemiah: In Review
Another short, and seemingly pointless bible book down. I'm still waiting for this inspiring rhetoric that I was told to expect when I started reading the bible.

By the way, why did Ezra never mention Nehemiah? Nehemiah at least gives Ezra a few sentences. This is just further proof that Nehemiah may have been exaggerating his importance.

I don't have anything else thrilling to say about Nehemiah.

I actually have fun news today. No tearing people down with logic today.

What do Steve Jobs (CEO of Apple Inc., just in case you live under a rock) and Jesus have in common? A group of sometimes irrational followers. Worshiped as the bringers of a new age (of computing in Jobs' case). Constantly at work to rid the world of evil (Microsoft). Actually, what don't Steve Jobs and Jesus have in common? I'm apparently not the only one that's made the connection:

The Economist



Bay of Fundie

This prompted Philip Elmer-DeWitt to write an article (where I got these pictures from) titled "Sacrilege: Steve Jobs as Jesus". To see more images, visit his blog (link at the bottom). I wonder if Philip knows what a joke is? These images are obviously not meant to be taken seriously, lighten up.

(via CNN Money Blog)


  1. I like the apple halo the best. Cheers dude. Late.


  2. If you're trying to build a nation based on ethnic identity, who you exclude is as important as who you include. These books are all about nation building at this point as the Israelites are trying to figure out how to put their national identity back together after the Exile. Telling everyone that God wants them to do it is (as always) just a way to get the dissenters to shut up and get in line.

    This prompted Philip Elmer-DeWitt to write an article titled "Sacrilege: Steve Jobs as Jesus". ... I wonder if Philip knows what a joke is? These images are obviously not meant to be taken seriously, lighten up.

    I'm fairly certain that even though they're joking it's still sacrilege. First definition off of Google: "The act of depriving something of its sacred character." Even if they're mocking Steve Jobs, it's still sacrilege (not that there's anything wrong with that, especially in this day and age).

    If he thought they weren't joking he probably would have used the word "heresy" instead of "sacrilege". Anyone who thought Steve Jobs was actually Jesus would be committing a heresy (and probably would need some psychological counseling and possibly a restraining order. Cause even if Steve Jobs thinks he's The Savior there's no reason for other folks to think that way...).

  3. Funny I always considered Steve Jobs to be a bit of an Usurper, trying to replace the generally open computer, software and electronics markets with his own exclusive brand of dumbed down Fisher Price My-First-Gadgets'.

    Just like all the prophets we've read about, he seems to desire power, and doesnt care about what has to be done to get that power...

    (Shut up- i hate Apple)

  4. @anonymous, well a little bit like you can't expect the authors of the bible to write logical stuff, you can't expect a CEO to not be corrupted by power and care about the damage he does gaining power.

    What I mean is they both thought they were (or he is) right and it all fits in his world-view.

    He's still an ass though.



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