Thursday, May 6, 2010

243: Don't Cut Your Hair, Except For This One Time

Ezekiel 5-8
"Now, son of man, take a sharp sword and use it as a barber's razor to shave your head and your beard. Then take a set of scales and divide up the hair." - Ezekiel 5:1

Ok, after a day of pure crazy, the bible has gone back to moderately weird and boring.

God starts out with an obligatory metaphor-that-must-be-acted-out. He first tells Ezekiel to cut off his hair. I guess God has turned the corner on the whole chopping off people's hair thing (remember in Leviticus that was a big no-no). God tells Ezekiel to take a third of his hair and "strike it with the sword all around the city". I'm not quite sure what that means, but I bet it's going to be something like Ezekiel running around the city looking like an idiot throwing his hair around. The second third of hair is to be thrown to the wind. The final third Ezekiel is to burn in a fire. Finally, Ezekiel is supposed to save a few strands of hair in the folds of his clothes.

What does this metaphor mean? Well, Ezekiel's hair is a metaphor for Israel (as usual). God is going to chop up one third of Israel, throw one third to the wind, and another third will die of famine (not fire apparently). I know I'm asking this question for about the fifth time, but why exactly does God insist on having his prophets act out his metaphors? Is he actively trying to make them look crazy in the eyes of everyone around them? Or it could just be that these prophets actually are crazy.

All of chapter 6 is just God repeating how he's going to kill the Israelites. This book is turning out suspiciously like the book of Jeremiah. Hopefully it won't be as long and boring as Jeremiah (yes, I know I say this for every book). God again repeats that he will destroy all but a few of the Israelites. Yes, we get it.

Chapter 7 is yet again rephrasing how God is going to kill the Israelites. He tells them (through Ezekiel) that the end has come. God says he will not have any pity on them or spare them from his wrath. I'll spare you most of the blatant repetitiveness of this chapter.

In chapter 8 God again appears to Ezekiel (i.e. the weird half metal, half fire God). God flies Ezekiel to Jerusalem and tells him to look upon the idols the Israelites have created. God then flies him to a courtyard were there is a hole in the wall. Ezekiel is instructed to dig into this hole. When he does he finds a passageway. Along this passageway someone has taken the time to record all the sins of Israel. All of the detestable animals they've eaten and all of their idols are recorded there. God then takes Ezekiel to see a group of 25 men worshiping the sun. God says he's going to punish these worshipers, but that's where the chapter ends. [to be continued...]

Fundie letters to the editor never cease to entertain me.
I’m enraged that American Christians are allowing the name of God to be taken out of every public institution, and we Americans are not even allowed to speak the name of Jesus, in fear that it might offend some ones religion in this country. What about our feelings, and beliefs as American Christians? Everything we believe in is being threatened or taken away from us, and given in to false gods and religions. There is no other god than the one who created heaven and earth.
When did this happen? Last time I checked I, you, and everyone could say Jesus whenever they wanted. Your concern for other people's feelings is admirable, but you're the only one preventing you from saying the word "Jesus". I challenge you to produce one solid thing that's being/been taken away from you as a Christian, I can't think of anything. Churches are still operating on Sunday, and freedom of religion is still in place.
Why has this country suffered so much in the last few years? God is taken out of the schools, and court houses, and not allowed to mention his name, or even pray publicly to our creator. Then America asks the question, what went wrong in America. We went wrong, we put our Jehovah God outside our lives, and said no thank you God, and shut the door.
So God is somehow punishing us for not praying enough? If only we had more God in schools and courthouses we'd be just fine? Not that we're too bad off right now in relation to a lot of the parts of the world. The masses aren't starving, for the most part people have homes (or at least places to sleep). And again, since when are people not allowed to mention God or pray publicly? I see people wearing Jesus paraphernalia all the time.
Remember when America was the greatest nation on earth, when God was our supreme deity? God stands at our hearts door and knocks, to anyone who would open and invite him into their life. Why can’t America see the light, and when everything started to go down hill in this country?
I don't personally remember those days, but I've heard stories. Stories of racial minorities being segregated, stories of child abuse in churches, and stories of gay/lesbian/transgendered people being killed for being who they are. I don't think I want to go back.


  1. Well, at least there are only 48 chapters in Ezekiel instead of 52 like in Jeremiah. But alas, the last 3 days of readings from the book will be mind-numbingly boring descriptions of the new temple. You'd better search for interesting news.

  2. Regarding your fundie letter about America being great when you believed in god, by that logic whoever is the 'greatest nation on earth' which I assume to mean biggest superpower (I would still argue America could be a candidate for that) has the best god?

    Well the Romans had LOADS of gods back in the day and they had an empire of epic proportions, they were clearly on to a good thing. And I think the Greeks did too...and the Chinese...and the Britons, no wait, my theory is unravelling...



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